Hard Boiled News

True Crime and News of the Weird from around the Globe

Crying Jordan Meme Used in Plea for Mercy in Mississippi Court

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The meme that will never die

OXFORD, Mississippi — An A+ for effort, but this student still failed.

A University of North Carolina student doing work on his dissertation at Ole Miss went the extra mile to argue out of speeding ticket, pleading sadness for being forced to be away for the Tar Heels’ dramatic NCAA win and even including a picture of crying Michael Jordan.

“I need your mercy,” the chastened student pleaded in a written submission to the court.

 

Police in Oxford, Mississippi said it was no dice in the end, and the student was found guilty of going 52-miles-per-hour in 40-mile-per-hour zone.

Additionally the student, who explained they were a PhD student visiting town on a “dissertation study,” included a detailed diagram and formula arguing that the excessive speed could be blamed on the fact that the car was going down hill and was not result of stepping on the gas.

The written submission signed off with the now infamous meme of a tearful Michael Jordan, after a lengthy explanation of why the court should show mercy.

“As a Tar Heels fan, I missed the important moment of celebrating the 2017 NCAA men’s basketball championship at Chapel Hill,” because the speeder was in Mississippi to study, the missive stated.

“Being a university town affords you some interesting court cases.This was the defendant’s reason for going 52 in a 40. Still found guilty,” the Oxford Police Department posted on its Twitter feed.

An Ole Miss physics professor later Tweeted a corrected version of the student’s formula explaining the fundamentals of acceleration.

“This article is being returned for revisions,” the professor wrote.

Hungry Criminal Named ‘Chopper’ Takes Bite Out of Mississippi Cop

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Adrian Burton made it abundantly clear how he got the nickname ‘Chopper’

ST. LOUIS, Mississippi — A Mississippi man nicknamed “Chopper” said he had a taste for human flesh when he took a bite out of a sheriff’s deputy during a traffic stop, cops said.

Adrian “Chopper” Burton, 51, of Waveland was a passenger in a car that got pulled over Sunday for having no license plate.

The Hancock County Sheriff’s Office said Deputy Marcus Jesseby was checking the identification of all the passengers in the car and when he got to Burton, he found drug paraphernalia in his possession.

As Jesseby attempted to place him under arrest, cops say Burton chomped down on the officer’s arm. Jesseby then zapped Burton with a Taser but he allegedly continued to resist. It was only after Jesseby hit him a second time with the stun gun that Burton was subdued.

“You tasted good,” Burton allegedly told the officer as he was being taken away.

“Maybe that’s how he got the name Chopper,” Hancock County Deputy Chief Don Bass told the Gulfport Sun Herald.

Jesseby was treated at a local hospital and later released. Burton was held an $8,500 bond.

 

 

 

Couple Busted For Using Bible to Smuggle Drugs into Prison

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Courtney Ford obviously had the wrong idea about what the bible is for

TUPELO, Mississippi — They confused the good book for the feel good book.

A Mississippi woman has been arrested for trying to smuggle drugs to her inmate boyfriend hidden inside a bible, police said.

Courtney Ford, 30, got caught with methamphetamine stashed inside the cover of the good book as she came to visit her boyfriend, Stephen Estes, 41, at the Lee County Jail on March 16.

“We search every item that is brought into the jail, and the property officer noticed something wrong. There was a bulge in the back cover of the Bible,” Lee County Sheriff Jim Johnson told the North Mississippi Daily Journal. “We cut it open and found a powdery substance.”

Cops determined the powder was meth and another substance that was sent to a lab for further testing.

Police say they think Estes was in on the act “because that day, he kept asking where his Bible was, even before she dropped it off,” Johnson said.

Stephen Estes could get his sentenced extended by 34 years

Ford was charged with criminal possession of a controlled substance and with trying to smuggle contraband into a correctional facility. She was previously out on bond for a prior possession charge and was held on $75,000 bond on the new charges.

Estes had been convicted just a week earlier of trafficking more than 30 grams of meth and was sentenced to 40 years in prison, although 34 of them were suspended. He was in the county lock up awaiting transport to a state prison.

“We hope to carry him back before the judge to have his sentence reconsidered,” Johnson said. “The judge could reinstate the 34 years and make him serve all 40 years.”